How can I find a inner peace in me and with my self, and at my life?

Hi coach

I realize that I have to start over and I need to find myself. Would like to go into myself and become enlightened, feel the spirit or God in me or just ... well, find peace and find myself. How should I do?

Should I eat something special? Know that many Buddhists eat very little and fast to find its interior. I want to learn to meditate but how do I start? Should I go for long walks in nature or visit a church to find the soul or?

I need your advice! How will I become calm, feeling good, travel within myself and feel the community with the world? All tips are welcome but I'm already a bit inside the meditation and yoga, I think. Something that also gives me energy! Should I surround myself of plants, incense and stones?

I am hopeful and grateful for your help and your response to my question here about how to find inner peace in me.

August


Hi August

You can be whatever you requires you to be!

Many believe that change is impossible, others take it for granted. Life shapes us through the years so arises easily stagnation so well thought action. We believe we often know best, but see everything as more often than not with clear eyes on ourselves. However, we are very quick to find flaws in others. Self-reflection becomes scarce.

If we are to improve our physical condition as this is done preferably by that we start exercising regularly and methodically. In the long term so improved our results and we must take advantage of our personal commitment. Why should it be different with our personal inner development, of course, we can use similar methods to achieve mental and physical health! But this is often our eternal self-defense in which says to us that it is either not possible or that nothing should be done!

Somewhere calling hopefully finally a warning bell that makes us awake and with a self-reflective smile might be able to laugh at ourselves, our personal problems, our shortcomings ... this might actually be a good start for change.

Why not come to self-awareness and courage to let go and start physical exercise your senses in the same way as you exercise your muscles and your body!

Mental health - to see the whole picture!

As a human, you have a free will to choose! You can choose how you deal with certain situations that occur, if you should interpret these positive, neutral or negative, if you want to expose yourself to them again or not! In the same way it is with how you look at yourself! You can actually choose whether you want to create confidence in yourself, create self-love and build a good self-esteem, or if you want to see more of yourself based on all the problems that you experience and that creates restrictions in your personality.

Several factors have been shown to affect your mental health: good diet and nutrition, and active physical exercise affects how you feel and indirectly your psyche, this is scientifically proven! Diseases also affect your psyche. Depression is almost twice as common in women than men, why? poor sleep, stress, imbalance in the hormone system also affects our personality, such as dopamine and serotonin are two important hormones for our well being.

Your personality also influences how you feel! Your personal preferences, your genes, including social factors are involved in shaping your personality. You have a personality, but you can also change your personality, it evolves all the time, depending on your experience and how you interact with your surroundings! By learning how to manage your thoughts can you practically actually change you and achieve better health!

Self-esteem! Decide to enjoy yourself! See your benefits! Release fear!

Many spiritual and religious traditions also believe that we consist of a deeper form of I of more eternal nature (the divine nature). This eternal I have many names, depending on the religious and spiritual school: the self, the soul, spirit soul, our inner eternal self, etc. In many developing personality teachings refers to this more divine inner self in personal development, in contrast to our outer ego that would correspond to the more changeable personality! Whatever you think about it, there are several practical methods readily available to achieve better psychological and mental health.

To begin to observe and understand your thoughts and practical use various methods to change your thinking is the key to better mental and physical health. If you are interested in learning more about different methods for active change management, you can use the methods described here: CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy, Mindfulness, Visualization, Affirmations, yoga, meditation, breathing exercises and mental training.

Thoughts that habit patterns!

95% percent of all the decisions we take, we do out of habit and without reflection. Ie only 5% of our decisions are fully aware! This according axiologerna studying how we think. According to them, they think you and I are about 40,000 thoughts per day! and there are more than 15 million different thought patterns! By learning to understand your thought patterns and even dare to change those who are not well aware, you have much of a success! By becoming more aware of your thoughts, you can also learn how to check different situations better, take the right decisions and develop to your full potential!

How are you thinking? What choices do you do in different situations? Do you think, and often feel the same way in similar situations? Have you changed your mind, depending on the different experiences? Do you often think negatively? How do you keep the negative thoughts away? you can see something positive in what may appear to be negative? Would another person interpret the situation differently? Are you willing to change you?

Resistance and habits!

At work, in social relationships, in practice, well in almost any context, it is some form of exercise, exercise, exercise, first of all to achieve good results as the knowledge, understanding and balance. When knowledge is acquired then, however, it significantly easier to maintain and improve the knowledge! Why should it be different with the mental and psychological health?
Resistance and failure really gives great opportunities for awakening and change, so although it may seem difficult with the potential to add value to you in the long run by creating insight and opportunity for change.

When are you comfortable! Can you do something different! What can you learn from your mistakes? How does your love out? When are you most selfish? Lets you often emotions control you? Have you tried to use your mind more conscious in a recurring situation successfully? Are you willing to work more actively with your psyche?

If you think you can not handle your undertakings. What are the chances that you fail, do you think?

Change your management!

Your environment affects you, and your life has influenced you so far! But the biggest reason for the way you feel affects you actually yourself! This is by humbly begin to learn to understand how you function as a person, how you think, feel and act, why it is as it is right now! which together will hopefully lead to the conclusion that you start your own change!

We are all pretty lost, scared and feel often unsuccessful in many situations. There is really nothing strange about that, because we're very similar, deep down, as you or I are not alone, and you do not take your failure as serious, but can choose to see them as lessons and input to something you can change the that you simply think it's time to move on ... and it is glorious with all change is that you will fall down and do a reboot now and then, such is life ...

You are the center of your own life and no one else! You are free to think and feel what you want!

Are you willing to start exercising your mental and psychic abilities regularly now? Read more about it next week here.

You can ask and send in your questions to me here! And You can also follow me the Mr Chris Savage as Mental Health Life Coach Therapist and Artist, Author, Photographer, Writer on my various social media channels here.

How do I know if I have a lack of confidence and poor self-esteem?

Hello life coach

I wonder if I suffer from low self-esteem.

It is often that I get anxious and have difficulty to get started and get things done, and this is because I do not dare or even bothered to take hold of them.

I do not think I will manage to do it, and therefore I avoid completely to make them instead, and this is not to expose myself to them. And I often blame that there is nothing I need to do or want to do, etc.

Plus I find it very difficult to get to me when I get compliments, and I hate cameras and also suffer mirror phobia because I do not like myself.

Do you think this is due to a lack of confidence and poor self-esteem?

Thanks in advance for your answer to my question.

Donald


Hi Donald

Based on your question, and as you enter you have trouble to find for you the compliments, hate cameras and suffering mirror phobia.

So here is a list of 10 signs you could have and suffer, if you have low self-esteem

1. Last time you walked past a mirror was your first thought is "But what's a horrible picture?"

2. Any tags you in ten pictures on Facebook. You have a ready template to copy claiming that reads "Please delete all the pictures of me, I'm so ugly."

3. Watching someone at you and says "I like you" is your first thought is always "How can you like me anyway?".

4. If someone on the subway looking at you and smiling at you, spin you around and always look for the person checked on someone behind you, or similar.

5. Does anyone out a camera, so you hiding directly like a ghost behind a corner.

6. Gives you a compliment, you never answer "thank you", but always with some kind of statement that the person's observations do not match.

7. Someone says "God, what a pretty dress!" and you say "Oh this old H & M cloth. Yes, I'm so fat, so I will not be in my other clothes anymore."

8. Your partner for four years, writing "I love you sweetie." Your answer: "Have you sent the wrong?"

9. If someone says, "God, how good looking you are today, but, oh, you have something in your hair" is this comment all you remember the sentence.

Answer Yes or correct more than half of these points to you. So you are suffering from and have low self-esteem.

But as luck is that you can do something about your low self-esteem, and you can read more about here.

You can ask and send in your questions to me here! And You can also follow me the Mr Chris Savage as Mental Health Life Coach Therapist and Artist, Author, Photographer, Writer on my various social media channels here.

I have a very low self-esteem, and what can I do about this and to get a better sense of self?

Hi Coach

I have a very poor self-esteem that allows me to work there on a work year after year, and I do not feel comfortable with.

I seek and will enter other good courses. But not begin because I do not think I'll do it. This leads all the time that I then remain in the same job, and I do not feel comfortable with, and then I feel bad because of it. How can I break this pattern, coach?

Linn


Hi Linn!

You do not want your bad self confidence will turn you inside, as it has done to date in many ways. You want to find new ways to behave in, and dare more.

Let me start by reason of what a lack of confidence and self-esteem is that state, and we'll see how much you recognize you.

Poor self-esteem is all about how hard you are performing, you feel unsatisfied. You "are" their performance. Low self-esteem on the other hand means to be judgmental toward yourself, and do not put any value on itself. Low self-esteem determines how we function in daily life and has a great impact on many areas of life.

From what you describe in your letter I understand that it is best for your self-esteem as it is about. Therefore, I will dwell on it.

A person with low self-esteem have a low opinion of himself, and put great emphasis on their weaknesses and shortcomings, but not their strengths and resources, and are explicitly self-critical.

Low self-esteem is also reflected in the behavior. A person with low self-esteem have lost their needs or their opinion, has an apologetic attitude, avoiding not only challenges, but all with the danger of being judged. You worry about being exposed as a fake. It is hard to believe that what is successful depends on the skill and knowledge. In relationship to the environment is one shy and hypersensitive to criticism. It can go so far as to pull away from contact and closeness. Opposite behaviors are, where they try to hide their insecurity by always behave confidently and calmly.

Bad experience often leads to low self-esteem. Based on the experience it has gained a critical understanding of himself, and the life. Experiences that may have contributed to a poor self-esteem is not having met the parents or peers requirements and perceived as "odd" in the family or at school, and that seldom have received praise, warmth and interest from its surroundings.

Do you recognize yourself? Low self-esteem is a way of thinking and behaving that in many ways is learned from an early age, but you can find ways to break with. However, let me also alert you to low self-esteem can sometimes be an element of a depression, or long-lasting problems with anxiety. If this applies to you is an efficient solution that you seek treatment for the primary problem.

You can also try on their own to find ways to break your learned circles for how you think and behave. You can say that you can begin to train you in getting a better sense of self by thinking and doing the opposite. How?

Try out this exercise (steps go a little into each other, but I describe it in stages for it to become more transparent).

Step 1. Become more attuned to the situations in which your bad self esteem strikes. Explore the thoughts, feelings and ethics that govern your actions when you want to start an education and then decide not to do it. We can call them your risk situations for acute low self-esteem. Write down the thoughts, feelings and ethics that you get in these situations.

Step 2. Next, you explore the plausibility of the thought, feeling or living rule that triggered your acute lack of self-esteem, and that is an obstacle to doing what you really want to do. A person with poor self-esteem can be based on their experiences have taught negative automatic thoughts, feelings, or maxims, such as: I will never let anyone see my true self, or it is better not to do something than to fail. It is of course difficult to live and come into its own with this kind of learned rules.

Ask yourself questions that will help you explore how these thoughts and maxims have come into your life. Would you, today, live from what those rules of life and express thoughts? How would a more loving thought or rule of life to let?

Remember that as an adult it is you who choose your own ethics. You may choose new precepts, and prepare yourself to be in situations that you would normally avoid. The aim is to making new adult experience shows that you can do more than what you think about.

Remember! To be an adult is to learn to live with their vulnerability and not get rid of it.

Step 3. Do what you want to do in the situation, encouraged by your new, more loving and tolerant thoughts and maxims. Use this way every day for eight weeks, and then evaluate how it has helped you become more attuned to how you "fooled" by your learned negative thoughts, feelings and ethics of yourself, and have been able to do more of what you want. Please continue for a long time to do this if you find that it helps you break the pattern you describe in your letter.

Step 4. Clarify for yourself what your goals are, both in everyday life and in the longer term to change jobs. Think about your values: What is important to you in your life? Please write them down. Read what you wrote down carefully, and ask you what you want to do in the next few weeks, and eventually, to get in tune with what you value. How can your values ​​help you take the first step in being able for example to change jobs? The idea of ​​my questions is that you let your values ​​govern you and give you strength, for example, dare to start the training you want to bet on.

Step 5. To initiate a change usually arouse anxiety, fear and other negative emotions. Remind you then that our negative thoughts and feelings are the result of our past experiences. Not infrequently, they warn us of the dangers we have experienced in the past, but that is not always true today. They are not always true. This you will discover more and more clearly as you do the exercises above, and no longer let your fears control what you do. It is about learning to live with your fears and do what is important to you in life today.

You can surf over your fear of doing what you want to do by having as a supportive self-talk that this is just overly critical thoughts or my old fears. I do not believe in, or let myself be guided by them. I can let them be within me, while I do what I want anyway.

Warm greetings and good luck Linn!

You can ask and send in your questions to me here! And You can also follow me the Mr Chris Savage as Mental Health Life Coach Therapist and Artist, Author, Photographer, Writer on my various social media channels here.