Hello life coach
I have questions about an issue.
When and how do I know that a friend just uses me, and this is to only pull their own benefit of our close friendship?
I have a friend that I always stand by and help with a lot of different things, and I never requiring anything in return.
Often give up and shoot up my own things that I would have done, and for that I instead choose to stand up for my friend who asks for help.
Those few times I ask for something. So says my friend often that this is busy with some other important things and, therefore, can not help me.
My friend also says that one should and can not expect and demand nothing in return. And of those you really love and are even really near and dear friends. Is it really good and close and good friends, so require or expect you never to get anything back from them, and think you like this, you can never be disappointed with your friends, says my friend.
Is my friend right in what is said, or is it just a way to manipulate me, and to be able to use me to all possible things?
Thanks in advance for your help and your response
Christi
Hi Christi
It is not always easy to tell if a friend using you or if the person is a true friend. However, there are certain situations or characteristics that affect how they relate to you is very special and that makes it easy to see through a negative friendship or when someone approaches with false intentions.
But here you have 4 different things that you can even transfer and check if your friend manipulates and exploits you.
They hear only when they need something
This is the basic property at a false or self-serving friendships; your friend hears only himself when he needs something from you. It can be very simple things; which lend a book or bussing person somewhere, but also more complicated situations, like t. ex. lend money.
To help your friends is a sign of love and care, but if you begin to notice that a person just come to you to ask for things, it may be time to put a limit or put an end to the situation.
They go out with friends without inviting you
It is quite natural to want to be our friends get to know each other and socialize on-one. But if someone who recently became a part of your circle of friends begins to go out with your friends without inviting you, and virtually hide this, it can be a warning sign.
It is important to be objective about this situation arises because it is sometimes easy to feel a bit threatened or jealous without any real basis. That is why it is recommended to analyze the situation very well before you take away from the person.
They use your personal information for their own benefit
Some false friends approaching you with the sole purpose of getting information about you that can be used to their advantage. Although this situation may be very obvious, you may still not take it all seriously.
This can manifest itself in many different kinds of situations, so you should be alert. It may be that the friend is trying to use your contact details for a job or to get benefits under your name. You can get involved in misunderstandings or serious problems with your contacts without having any idea what was happening.
You constantly get slammed
A true friendship is sincere and not self-serving, but at times we need our friends' help. It may be that you need someone to listen, a service, or that they help you in certain situations. If you notice that your friend always refuses to help you, it is probably not a very sincere friendship.
This point is closely related to the first point, then it is very common in false friendship that the person always asks you for help or trying to take advantage of you, but disappear when you need something.
Far from all the people we meet in our lives has the intention to exploit us or bring us harm, but it is important to be alert to avoid being exploited by those who have such intentions.
But if any seats in all four criteria above. You should immediately dispose of those friends, and completely get rid of them from your life. For they are no friends, only people who manipulate and exploit you because you are good and kind person.
And if someone shows signs of any of those four criteria above. Will you be observant and vigilant about this person. For it is a sure sign. That this is a man who would take a lot more than it really wants to give back to you as a friend.
I hope my answer is helpful to you, and that they address themselves to you, which precise friends you should keep or not in your life.
You can ask and send in your questions to me here! And You can also follow me the Mr Chris Savage as Mental Health Life Coach Therapist and Artist, Author, Photographer, Writer on my various social media channels here.
I have questions about an issue.
When and how do I know that a friend just uses me, and this is to only pull their own benefit of our close friendship?
I have a friend that I always stand by and help with a lot of different things, and I never requiring anything in return.
Often give up and shoot up my own things that I would have done, and for that I instead choose to stand up for my friend who asks for help.
Those few times I ask for something. So says my friend often that this is busy with some other important things and, therefore, can not help me.
My friend also says that one should and can not expect and demand nothing in return. And of those you really love and are even really near and dear friends. Is it really good and close and good friends, so require or expect you never to get anything back from them, and think you like this, you can never be disappointed with your friends, says my friend.
Is my friend right in what is said, or is it just a way to manipulate me, and to be able to use me to all possible things?
Thanks in advance for your help and your response
Christi
Hi Christi
It is not always easy to tell if a friend using you or if the person is a true friend. However, there are certain situations or characteristics that affect how they relate to you is very special and that makes it easy to see through a negative friendship or when someone approaches with false intentions.
But here you have 4 different things that you can even transfer and check if your friend manipulates and exploits you.
They hear only when they need something
This is the basic property at a false or self-serving friendships; your friend hears only himself when he needs something from you. It can be very simple things; which lend a book or bussing person somewhere, but also more complicated situations, like t. ex. lend money.
To help your friends is a sign of love and care, but if you begin to notice that a person just come to you to ask for things, it may be time to put a limit or put an end to the situation.
They go out with friends without inviting you
It is quite natural to want to be our friends get to know each other and socialize on-one. But if someone who recently became a part of your circle of friends begins to go out with your friends without inviting you, and virtually hide this, it can be a warning sign.
It is important to be objective about this situation arises because it is sometimes easy to feel a bit threatened or jealous without any real basis. That is why it is recommended to analyze the situation very well before you take away from the person.
They use your personal information for their own benefit
Some false friends approaching you with the sole purpose of getting information about you that can be used to their advantage. Although this situation may be very obvious, you may still not take it all seriously.
This can manifest itself in many different kinds of situations, so you should be alert. It may be that the friend is trying to use your contact details for a job or to get benefits under your name. You can get involved in misunderstandings or serious problems with your contacts without having any idea what was happening.
You constantly get slammed
A true friendship is sincere and not self-serving, but at times we need our friends' help. It may be that you need someone to listen, a service, or that they help you in certain situations. If you notice that your friend always refuses to help you, it is probably not a very sincere friendship.
This point is closely related to the first point, then it is very common in false friendship that the person always asks you for help or trying to take advantage of you, but disappear when you need something.
Far from all the people we meet in our lives has the intention to exploit us or bring us harm, but it is important to be alert to avoid being exploited by those who have such intentions.
But if any seats in all four criteria above. You should immediately dispose of those friends, and completely get rid of them from your life. For they are no friends, only people who manipulate and exploit you because you are good and kind person.
And if someone shows signs of any of those four criteria above. Will you be observant and vigilant about this person. For it is a sure sign. That this is a man who would take a lot more than it really wants to give back to you as a friend.
I hope my answer is helpful to you, and that they address themselves to you, which precise friends you should keep or not in your life.
You can ask and send in your questions to me here! And You can also follow me the Mr Chris Savage as Mental Health Life Coach Therapist and Artist, Author, Photographer, Writer on my various social media channels here.
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